If you are looking for love online, a great profile is key. Of course, you need attractive photos, but those looking for a real relationship will look beyond a pretty face to discover what it is all about. It would be nice if everyone could give you the benefit of the doubt and magically see how fascinating, unique and loving you are, but that is not how online dating works
A generic profile that does not say much or says that the wrong things will be overlooked by the same people you really want to connect with. There are a lot of quality singles online. If you expect to meet one of them, talk to them, not the masses!
There are a huge number of online dating website you can find. But, you need to find a website that is suitable for you. Then you can follow several tips discussed below:
- Post some of your favorite photos to your profile. Set up a profile photo what can describe you best.
- Don’t make a camouflage about yourself(like age, height, weight etc).
- Talk about your original & specific interests, like, mention the best sunset you’ve ever seen instead of saying you like sunsets; say which music you like most instead of saying a band name.
- Are you excited about your upcoming trip? If so, post about it in your profile. Always refresh your profile.
- Playing the waiting game is not a good practice at all. So, you need to respond quickly.
- First impressions are a very important thing. You may have a high IQ, but your date won’t believe you if they get a message with spelling errors.
- You should log on daily to your online dating site. Proof yourself as an active member. Belief your date that they the most chance to get the reply.
1. Make a snapshot of who you are, how you live your life and the relationship you are looking for.
Your profile should begin by describing your most prominent and positive character traits. You’re funny? Outgoing? Creative? Loyal? Affectionate? Intellectually curious? Choose 3 or 4 adjectives that best describe your personality. If you are at a loss, ask your friends for help to describe you. How would you describe someone you were being put with?
Make sure you also include what you care about. Do not use the crutch to describe your work and move on. It is not a curriculum vitae, and your work should be poorly focused. If you love your work, say it. But what is more important, what are you passionate about? Do you care more about making music? Helping others? Win a professional surfing competition or rescue stray dogs? If you’re interested in learning new languages and taking trips to test your skills, say so! The right people will think that is incredible.
Lastly, be honest about what you are looking for. Do not stop and minimize your desire to be in a committed relationship, or your desire to the contrary! Remember: you want to attract people who are looking for what you are looking for. If you want a relationship, say so!
2. Who you want to meet: the character, not the characteristics.
I can not emphasize this enough. Be sure to tell who you want to meet in your profile, without sounding too specific about your characteristics. Avoid listing hobbies, height, body type, education and the interests of your ideal partner.
When you focus on the character, you are being specific about your values, which will resonate with like-minded people. If you focus on the features, you run the risk of appearing superficial, rigid or overly demanding. These are not attractive qualities!
For example, instead of specifying the characteristic of “having a body in shape”, you must indicate the character trait of “active” or “assess health and physical condition”. The first example is about a result (body in shape), in the latter a way of life (being active and taking care of yourself). The first excludes people who do not want someone who is too preoccupied with appearances (even if they are appropriate), and the second includes the fit people who care more about the superficial.
Remember: your profile has already started by saying who you are and what you are into: if someone is still reading, they are already interested and concerned about what matters to you. If you really want to meet someone who loves navigation because navigation is your passion, that person who also loves navigation will be hooked as soon as they read, that’s your passion! If they hate sailing, they hate water and they hate sailors, they are gone.
3. The show, do not say.
When writing about who you are and how you live your life, be sure to show the reader what that looks like in action. You are trying to attract the right people to you and to do that you need to be specific.
For example, many people say in their profiles that they like to travel. “Traveling” can mean anything from a trip to Disneyworld, a walk along the Appalachian Trail, a Mediterranean cruise or a luxury safari in Kenya. Do not assume that the reader will know which of these you will be interested in!
Talk about your favorite travel destinations, your dream vacation or the best trip you have taken, the person who loves your type of trip, or who intrigues you, will take note!
Instead of saying “I love having fun,” say “I love having fun, my ideal weekend includes bowling, a Netflix binge, and a pancake brunch.” It’s not an idea of fun for everyone, but if it’s yours, get it!
If one of your defining values is loyalty, show how that looks in your life. When you’re in love, are you the best cheerleader of your partner? Have you been with your beloved baseball team loser? Or the best friends of your childhood? Look to your life to see real examples!
The added advantage of specificity is that it gives people who wish to communicate with you a “hook” to mention in a message for you.
5. Decide the story you want to tell.
Your profile tells a story It should not be a novel (consider this as an extra tip!), But a short story that captures your personality. I could tell the story of a traveler from the athletic and ambitious world, or a sincere and geeky introvert. Or I could tell the story of a bitter and demanding perfectionist. Review your profile, photos and text together and ask yourself:
Who do I show? What story am I telling about my life?
Your story dictates who is attracted to you, so make sure you get the attention of the right people. If you can not be objective about your profile, ask someone you trust to read it for you. Are you highlighting your best qualities? What are you saying between the lines? Is it what your ideal partner wants to hear?
Are you expressing what is unique to you and what is attractive to whoever wants to have an appointment? If you can do that, you’re winning! And you could find the perfect person for you online.
6. Check your spelling and grammar.
Since we are talking about writing a profile, I have to mention the spelling and the grammar. There is a lot of bad spelling and grammar out there. And there are many online profiles that list spelling errors and bad grammar as a favorite motif. And some of those same people have spelling errors and bad grammar in their profiles!
Many people will forgive typographical errors, but do not risk shutting down someone simply because they did not use spell checking.
The consideration and care they put into their profile will be shown and appreciated by others. So make the effort to clean up your mistakes!
Francesca is a professional dating coach and matchmaker. You can see her as an expert guest on The Today Show on NBC and The Hoda Kotb Show on SiriusXM. Get more free advice on dating, including a guide to your perfect online photos.